Asperger's ppl often have trouble in daily life.
For example, comunication with others, loud noise, food and clothe, sometimes thoes stress cause other sickness.
and 50% of asperger's ppl are alexithymia, which means trouble noticing their own emotions.
So they easily keep stress until they get sick.
Recently i found myself has this alexithymia a little.
From my childhood, the end of a day, i always repeat the day in details to comfirm. And all the emotions attack my mind. Even though good things can hurt my mind.
But now, i understand what was happening to me. i repeat to see my emotions that i couldn't find at the moment.
Once i understand, i can find a way to handle.
This discovery was pretty big so i told my boyfriend. I expected him to know my pain and efort. But he said
'" no, don't say that. You're normal, you're fine. "
I know what he meant but still this word was painful, because i felt like he treats my efort nothing.
Asperger's ppl often need to give more efort to just live a life. we start from -1.
For me 'just fine' is far far away from my start-line. When i get there, i must be exhausted but people around are 'just fine', they just started their marathon.
So, its simple. I wanted my boyfriend to say 'i see. I understand that you tried hard. You're doing great.'
I want people i love to see my progress, not only my results
Hi thank you for coming to my blog. I have a mental disease called bipolar disorder, and asperger's syndrome. its just I have bigger emotion waves than people usually do. I've been having hard days dealing my disorder, and I'm trying to express myself in this blog showing my drawings and paintings! I hope you like it!
2018年8月13日月曜日
Asperger's
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